Monday, December 31, 2012

Wednesday, December 26, 2012

Christmas Funnies

We had a really lovely Christmas here.  Christmas Eve we had Erik's family over.  Christmas Day we had mine.  I love Christmas.  I love Santa too.  I just wanted to show you these two photos I took that make me laugh and laugh and laugh.
The boys looked so cute on Christmas Eve in their matching pajamas.  I wanted to take their picture before bed.  So I did and we got Clark W. Griswold in the background.  I really love this picture and I'm printing it out in 8x8 because it's just so fitting for our family.  It's not Christmas without Clark Griswold...or vacations for that matter with my dad...aka Clark.

And my very own Auto Correct Error.  That I laughed and laughed about all day.  Erik said I was ridiculous.  I needed a damn baster for the rib roast but auto correct changed it to badger.  And then I couldn't stop picturing the badger in the car with my dad, and his face would be all scratched up.  And it was just hilarious so I had to tell my bestie, Val.  Who laughed and laughed and laughed.  I am laughing while typing this right now.  If you don't think it's funny well, you can just side with Team Erik :)  And if you thinks its funny, then you are a genius and side with Team Mariah.

Have a good day, I'm going to work on my Thanksgiving layout later today...I'm also awaiting pics for project life.  Apparently they won't be in until after the first of the year :(

Sunday, December 23, 2012

26 Acts

26 Acts to remember the 26 people in Newtown who lost their lives.  I'm not going to say much on the topic of Newtown.  I think that we as a country need to do some reflection, and to realize that we still live in a world that is good.  That is full of good people.  As, part of this whole one little word...BALANCE thing I'm doing, Erik and I have really been reflecting on things.  We realize that we do some things really well as parents, and some things that we really need to improve on.  So I saw this idea online and I thought it would be really something good to do with our children.  We are composing a list of 26 acts of kindness to do throughout the year.  26 things that will make a random person feel good and hopefully pass it on to someone else.

I also wanted to leave you with this quote from Mr. Rogers because I think it's something we really, really need to remember.

“When I was a boy and I would see scary things in the news, my mother would say to me, ‘Look for the helpers. You will always find people who are helping.’ To this day, especially in times of ‘disaster,’ I remember my mother’s words, and I am always comforted by realizing that there are still so many helpers - so many caring people in this world.”

Have a great day with your families...I'm going to be very busy preparing for Christmas Eve and Day!  

Saturday, December 22, 2012

Hopeless...a few words.

So, let me just get it all out there.  Let me just tell the truth.  The fact of the matter is that I have felt so lost this last year or two.  I haven't scrapbooked.  I haven't done the things I've wanted to do.  And I really think, if you go back and read my posts on this blog there were hints to this.  Little hints that some part of me was no longer there.  Because it wasn't.  I was lost.  Lost in something.  What it was, I don't know.  I wasn't sad, per say.  I just felt off.  I let things overwhelm me.  I let things slip by.  I let things go...and I let myself go.  And I don't mean I gained like 50 lbs.  I just mean, I may have forgotten who I was.  Then, I got to the point where I couldn't take anymore.  I wanted to be me again.  That crazy girl...the funny one...the serious one...the fashionable one...the one who didn't ever give up.  I wanted that girl.  I missed her.  I really missed her.  And so two weeks ago, I bought a journal.  Because I needed one.  I NEEDED to have this one little place to myself.  I wanted to share it on my blog, I did.  I just couldn't summon the energy to do it.  And when I bought that journal, I felt the first layer crack.  I felt it slip away.  I hugged my journal...and I loved it.  Erik may/maynot have thought I was insane.  And then I also had to let go of my dream.  I cried for my dream.  I mean I laid on the floor of the closet and sobbed.  I cried for all I wished for.  It had to slip away.  And that dream was moving home.  Raising my boys at home.  HOME...a small little town that I love.  But I had to let it go.  The things I envisioned for my life, I had to realize were over.  You see, my husband was perfection at his job.  He represented everything for me.  Everything, I couldn't physically be.  I can't work on a jobsite.  I'm not strong enough.  It just couldn't happen.  I grew up on a jobsite.  And I learned so many, many things.  But you see, my husband represented ME.  He lived my dream.  He lived it for 10 years.  And he did it without complaint.  He went to work everyday and he gave his best.  But his best was NEVER good enough.  It was never, never good enough.  There is this thing called control...and I understand control because I love control.  I do.  It is what I need.  I thrive on it.  But I had to let it go.  And this past year has been about me fighting for control.  Guess what?  Control means nothing.  It means absolutely nothing if it comes at the cost of everything.  The way I always envisioned my life is over.  It's gone.  We aren't going to move home.  We aren't going to be a part of the most important thing I've ever been part of.  It's done.  And it burns all the way down to my soul.  It does.  I just cannot change things, because I don't have that kind of control.  It's really hard to write this, because it's always hard to give up on your dreams.  It's so hard to let them go, when it's all you wished for.  And I know this sounds so crazy, but I finished reading Hopeless (by Colleen Hooover) today.  And every last thing clicked into place.  The last layer was broken.  And I felt this freedom in my stomach.  This huge relief.  I haven't felt it in so long.  I actually felt the knot in my stomach loosen.  The story was everything I needed.  It was poignant.  It was perfect.  I was breathless, because there were so many words in it that made sense to me.  That struck home.

And so today, I scrapbooked.  It felt so good.  Then I ordered pictures for my Project Life Album.  And they're going to be printed.  And I'm going to finish it.  For this next year, I came up with one little word (Thanks Ali Edwards...her one little word project rang in my head loudly).  The word is BALANCE.  Balance, and because I didn't want to procrastinate until 2013, I started trying to figure out things.  I want my life back in balance.  I want it all to make sense.  I don't want to be overwhelmed anymore.  I want to be that ferocious, passionate girl I've always been.  And I'm going to find her.  I know I am.  And I know that everything is going to balance out.  It's going to work out.  And, God, you guys...I am so back.  I am so back.  And it feels so good to say this.  You don't know what this means.  Thank you all for riding along.  For sharing in my moments.  Thank you so much...but just know I'm back!  I AM BACK!

Friday, December 21, 2012

The Learning Boy 12x12 Layout (P.S. I think I'm back)

All the supplies are from my Studio Calico Monthly Kit...I mixed and matched kits so I can't give you a month.

Two posts in one day?  It must be a Christmas Miracle.  This photo is an 8x8 print, printed from Postal Pics.  I uploaded it directly from my phone and the filter is from Instagram.  It's just a simple little layout, but it's the first one I've done in months.  Months.  Because I haven't been able to bring myself to scrapbook.  

In my previous post, I mentioned the book, Hopeless.  And I'm telling you it snapped something inside of me.  And I have jotted some ideas down that I would like to share.  So we will see.  But I haven't felt like this in a long time.  And as I type, I am going through pictures for my Project Life Album...hoping to have them printed off soon.  And actually, not as I type because that would be impossible.  You know what I mean.

God, it's good to be back!  So good :)

Another Must Read...Hopeless by Colleen Hoover

I just finished this book.  Just now.  This book is breathtaking.  Absolutely breathtaking.  You must read this book.  Here is the synopsis from Amazon.

Sometimes discovering the truth can leave you more hopeless than believing the lies...

That's what seventeen-year-old Sky realizes after she meets Dean Holder. A guy with a reputation that rivals her own and an uncanny ability to invoke feelings in her she's never had before. He terrifies her and captivates her all in the span of one encounter, and something about the way he makes her feel sparks buried memories from a past she wishes could just stay buried.

Sky struggles to keep him at a distance knowing he's nothing but trouble, but Holder insists on learning everything about her. After finally caving to his unwavering pursuit, Sky soon finds that Holder isn't at all who he's been claiming to be. When the secrets he's been keeping are finally revealed, every single facet of Sky's life will change forever.

There is so much more to this book than the synopsis.  It was life altering for me.  Here is a quote from the book that I will keep with me forever:  (Hope I don't get arrested for posting it :))

"The things that knock you down in life are tests, forcing you to make a choice between giving in and remaining on the ground or wiping the dirt off and standing up even taller than you did before you were knocked down.  I'm choosing to stand up taller.  I'll probably get knocked down a few more times before this life is through with me, but I can guarantee you I'll never stay on the ground."

Go read this book.  You won't be sorry you did.

Sunday, December 16, 2012

Christmas Break

I'm on Christmas Break!!!  I am so glad for this break.  It has been such a stressful first semester at school.  I will have time to get my photo situation figured out so I can upload pictures to this blog, scrapbooking done, and etc. etc.  I've barely started my Christmas shopping :(  Hope all is well in your neck of the woods.  Have a great day!

Tuesday, December 4, 2012

Technical Difficulties

So, it seems I have run out of storage on my web album...That means I can't post pics til I figure this out.  Please bear with me.  I'll be up and running soon.


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